Acceptable Conduct While Watching “The Big Game”

Whilst watching the big game, thou shall not speak excessively or become overly engaged in activities unrelated to the sports game at hand. Time spent watching sports is to be dedicated primarily to sports.

Terms & Conditions:

• While all occupants of the room may be upset at the most recent screw-up of the home team, you do not necessarily have to make an audible reaction to every play, because chances are, nobody cares what you think.
• Those who choose to only “half pay attention” to the game should leave those who are diehards in peace.
• Complaining about the other team performing well or making spectacular plays shall be prohibited, whereas respecting or acknowledging the talent of the other team is perfectly acceptable.
• If your reaction to what is happening on-screen makes a fellow diehard actually jump, chances are you overreacted, or at least need to tone it down a bit.
• All situations are different — depending on the context of the people present, the place where the game is being watched, as well as the importance of said game, different expectations or codes of conduct may apply. It is up to you to decide how much of your mental and social capacity is to be devoted to sports — never let sports come between you and what is in your best interest.
• Bandwagoners shall not speak.
• Never take talent for granted. Never assume that the receiver will make the catch, or that the free throw is a sure thing; the same holds true for the opposition, assuming the opposition will make the great play just leads to pessimism that no one likes to hear. In order to reduce shock or potentially annoying reactions, expect the unexpected.

Exceptions:

• In some cases, significant others or friends who are unfamiliar with the sport being played are present — these types of situations usually merit extra explanations or commentary on the game.
• When “the game” at hand has nothing to do with the home-team or is relatively unimportant in comparison to other entertainment options available, casual conversations are permitted.
• Sports is one of the major sources of male bonding, and as such, it is important that enough conversation is established to find a happy medium between sports and life outside sports. While building a life around sports is common (and with good reason), when things need to be said, they should be said.